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feat: edits to sarla story

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Deepak Mallubhotla 2022-07-02 08:58:11 -05:00
parent ed6bf304a8
commit fe755c1519
Signed by: deepak
GPG Key ID: BEBAEBF28083E022
2 changed files with 14 additions and 19 deletions
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30
sarlastory/sarla-goes-to-redgrove.txt
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@ -79,25 +79,13 @@ Sarla felt her temper start to flare at being assigned blame by Isidor's fawning
―As I'd have told you if you'd asked, I have command up to the unyielding Meadowlark. ―As I'd have told you if you'd asked, I have command up to the unyielding Meadowlark.
I've mastered Notburga's techniques for crop blessings as part of my studies. I've mastered Notburga's techniques for crop blessings as part of my studies.
I still haven't gotten any other information on what I'll be asked to do. I still haven't gotten any other information on what I'll be asked to do.
If I had, I'd have done more research on anything else you need me to do. If I had, I'd have done more research.
―It's important you be honest, Brody said.
How much command do you actually have over the unyielding Meadowlark?
If you only know a few techniques, it changes what Isidor will promise
―I meant what I said.
I can connect completely with the unyielding Meadowlark.
Brody started to say something, but the Ennearch interrupted him. Brody started to say something, but the Ennearch interrupted him.
―Brody, let her be. ―Brody, let her be.
If she's telling the truth, then Peter will be pleased. You think you're clever, don't you?, Isidor said to her.
If not, Auroklos will suffer the consequences. Auroklos said you had a lot of potential.
He turned back to look at Sarla.
―You think you're clever, don't you?, Isidor said.
Auroklos said you could become quite powerful.
But using the Meadowlark is just one kind of power. But using the Meadowlark is just one kind of power.
My kind of power is that you are here, working for me. My kind of power is that you are here, working for me.
Which kind do you think is better? Which kind do you think is better?
@ -106,7 +94,8 @@ Sarla felt shame and anger curdle in her chest.
She looked down and kept silent. She looked down and kept silent.
―Exactly, Isidor said. ―Exactly, Isidor said.
Shelve your arrogance and learn your place. Shelve your arrogance.
Learn your place.
The journey continued in an awkward, tense near-silence, broken only by the occasional squeals and grumbles from the engine of the coach and the crunch of dirt and rock under wheels. The journey continued in an awkward, tense near-silence, broken only by the occasional squeals and grumbles from the engine of the coach and the crunch of dirt and rock under wheels.
By the time they'd left the Haven, the Ennearch had fallen asleep in his seat, leaving Sarla to stew. By the time they'd left the Haven, the Ennearch had fallen asleep in his seat, leaving Sarla to stew.
@ -237,9 +226,14 @@ Ahead of her, a circle of red was growing outwards from where she first touched
The circle rapidly expanded, until the entire valley ahead was in bloom. The circle rapidly expanded, until the entire valley ahead was in bloom.
Brody was standing slack-jawed, and Fidgetboy turned to give Sarla a wide-eyed stare of unalloyed admiration. Brody was standing slack-jawed, and Fidgetboy turned to give Sarla a wide-eyed stare of unalloyed admiration.
Sarla felt exhausted.
Her eyes started to blur looking out at the horizon ahead.
―May the Lord preserve us, Peter said. ―May the Lord preserve us, Peter said.
I knew we had always dutifully supported the Hierarchy, but... I knew we had always dutifully supported the Hierarchy, but...
He trailed off and turned to Isidor, before kneeling. Sarla felt a rush of numbness across her body and her legs buckled.
Peter trailed off and turned to Isidor, before kneeling.
―Your Grace, Redgrove is yours to command. ―Your Grace, my people are yours to command, for now until eternity.
Anger at not being given immediate credit bubbled up in her gut, but before she could say something rash, she hit the ground and registered nothing else.

3
sarlastory/warmup-2022-06-11.txt
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@ -209,7 +209,8 @@ Sarla sat and chewed her food slowly.
―No idea, Sarla shrugged. ―No idea, Sarla shrugged.
―Well you're still probably fucked either way if you return it to the library scribbled on. ―Well you're still probably fucked.
Hope you can find a replacement.
I don't know what you were thinking about with your notes. I don't know what you were thinking about with your notes.
I mean it was greycaps, so only the Lord of the Mountain knows if it was useful or nonsense. I mean it was greycaps, so only the Lord of the Mountain knows if it was useful or nonsense.
You were babbling about children's stories being the key to truth. You were babbling about children's stories being the key to truth.